Happiness is a Choice

For those of us who live in the Northern hemisphere, Spring is just around the corner. Yesterday on my Facebook feed, I saw posted, a photo of the first daffodil to appear on the banks of Clifford’s Tower in York. This momentous occasion heralds the beginning of Spring in England, for me. In California, the days vary between being very hot and cold, damp and foggy.

So today as another Winter draws to a close, we look at creating a list in order to create a better mood, in readiness for welcoming in the beginning of Spring. Traditionally, this is the season in which we gain the energy to push ahead with all the goals and projects that we started planning over the Winter months. So here is this week’s list for creating a better mood:

  1. Understand that you have the ability to change your perception of life, and therefore your mood, at any time you wish (I am not including those people who suffer from any form of depression here. If that is the case then I suggest seeking medical help).
  2. One of the things that we do as humans, is to live life on certain vibrations, and we tend to live on these vibrations unconsciously. If you want to create a better mood, start by becoming intentional about being happy. Practice living on a vibration of happiness, without having to rely on external factors. Practice smiling (an instant mood-booster) and reach for the happiest thought that you can think right now.
  3. Practice gratitude for all that you have right now.
  4. Create an environment for yourself that lifts your spirits. Play music that speaks to your soul, watch uplifting movies, wear bright colours (it can be a lipstick or scarf to add colour to a neutral wardrobe).
  5. Start hanging out with upbeat people and watch that your mood doesn’t try to drag others down. Do you meet someone and begin moaning about life as soon as you meet them? Make sure that you begin conversations in an upbeat positive manner – this is something I am working on as I often arrive late, full of apologies about how busy I am. I am consciously working on arriving on time and unstressed. The other person does not want to know about your troubles in the first five minutes of seeing you.
  6. If something is getting to be a chore, then change your routine, or your attitude towards it. Do something out of the ordinary. I found that I was dragging myself out of bed on a cold, dark Winter’s morning to do my yoga. Once I was doing it, I loved it but getting up was the hard part. In order to get myself more excited about beginning my day, I found some inspiring music on YouTube which lifted my spirits so much that I now bounce out of bed much more easily because the lyrics have such a positive effect on my mood. Check out Karen Drucker – ‘Thank You For This Day’ on YouTube.

Have a great week. Check out my YouTube Channel – Coaching to Confidence and let me know how you are getting on with the lists.

Care Less, Live More!

Are you one of those people who cares too much about what other people think of you?

Do you worry that people are always talking about you?

Are you afraid to express your true opinions?

Do you aim to please, everyone?

Do you find yourself saying ‘Yes’, when you really mean ‘NO’?

It is time to stop caring what others think. Why?

You give away your power

You give up your happiness

You live in fear

Your focus is scattered if you are always at the mercy of others demands and opinions.

So how can you begin to care less about how others view you?

  • Find out who you are. What are your preferences, your desires, your dreams?
  • Practice self-acceptance. If you want to do something, don’t automatically ask others for their opinion or their permission. Start by making smaller decisions for yourself.
  • Learn to accept that some people won’t be happy if you say ‘No’ to them, especially at first.
  • The only real opinion of you that matters – is YOUR’S!
  • Decide how much help you can give to others and plan accordingly. This is a good way of softening the blow at first if you are always someone who does a favor when asked. Next time someone asks you to do ‘X’ tell them that you are sorry you can’t do ‘X’ but you are willing to do ‘Y’. Or you could practice asking for a favor in return, for example when a friend asks you to babysit, you could reply with ‘oh yes, I was going to ask if you could babysit for me one night, let’s do a swap’. You will soon find out who is genuinely interested in helping you and those who expect help but don’t want to return the favor in any way. If this is the case:
  • Find a new tribe!
  • Finally stop judging yourself and start loving yourself.